sucks...

So tonight I had to skip my bible study so that I could help out with "rollout". Some rollout...we don't even get the product until thursday because of the holiday. I get there and not much is going on, and not much has really been planned. I spend the better part of an hour trying to ascertain what is going on and what I should get to first. This turns out to be the source of much frustration during my night. Finally I just start doing one of the things on the list of things-to-do, even though we're not sure yet what is a priority. Between 7 and 9 my tasking is interrupted twice by customers who need "special assistance".

Let me clarify something...our policy at the good old crew is to NOT prosecute, accuse, make implications, or in any other way deter shoplifters. We are to provide "excellent customer service" to said shoplifters as they rip us off royally.

The first interruption involved 4 suspicious ladies (suspicious = carrying multiple, large, empty shopping bags usually from christmastime or 5 years ago or something, moving in packs, picking off associates one by one as a distraction, and picking up merchandise without looking at it, carrying it around and repeating.) Despite our "excellent customer service" and practically following them around the store cleaning up the messes they left behind them, they trickled out one by one to the sound of store alarms while we stood there, mouths agape. They are so freaking sneaky...we don't even know what they took.

The second interruption happened around 8:50pm when two different suspicious ladies were roaming around the store. One was abound with, I'm not kidding you, 10 large shopping bags. This one I recognized from other encounters. After opening a fitting room for this lady, again providing excellent customer service, running back and forth to find sizes, offering to "clear out" anything that wasn't working, etc. she finished up at 9:15, coming out of the room on her cell phone, handing me a wad of clothes that undoubtedly contained the ripped off tags of some poor piece of clothing. She went up to the cashwrap to purchase two items totalling about $30 and casually left the store with her friend. I searched the fitting room and wad of clothes and found two sensor tags stuck to the bottom of the stool and one tag in the wad. She walked out with two pair of suit pants ($98 each) and a sweater ($32).

Now, you tell me if this is right?? I have to stand by and smile and run my ass off for people who I know have stolen from us before and are going to steal from us again?? No! It's not freaking right! It sucks...we can't even call mall security to do a walk through because the shoplifters might get agitated. You think I care if some moron starts yelling about how they feel persecuted and they'll never come back to this store? Good...don't come back! I don't need the stress...freaking...ANGER!!

Tina - Come get your HAM!!

Yes that llama is smiling and no the photo isn't doctored. We went to the zoo today with shedubeard, crazymom, and the girls. I was really freakin' hot and humid but we still had a lot of fun! The good old John Ball Zoo was hoppin'...we saw goats and bears and the penguins were swimming and the prarie were poking their heads out. Half way through the park we stopped for sno cones and ice cream sandwiches. After finishing these frozen treats, we carried on with less enthusiasm than before...it was just so hot. We kept walking by people who were dripping with sweat and even though I was hot, I couldn't help wondering if these people were jogging around the zoo or doing jumping jacks or something. I felt bad for the shedu family having to ride home on leather seats. When we got home we decided to spend some time in our cool basement watching a movie. After that stemshul made dinner and Bishop went swimming in the sprinkler puddles in the backyard. Now we're playing some game cube with ugly, whitey, and derrick...first day off...successful.

uhhh...yeah

I really have nothing new...and not much inspiration...but I'm sick of looking at the last post...

I was a kindergarten teacher today. It was interesting, at this school kindergarten is all day, but they go every other day during the week. If you ask me...which no one is actually doing...a full day is too long for 5-6 year olds. They were great in the morning, a little chatty but that's normal, especially with a sub. They were quiet in the halls, excellent in a bike safety assembly, and quiet during shared reading. Then they came back from lunch and they turned into little monsters. Let's forget the fact that they were expected to sit and work independently in the computer lab for 45 minutes! I mean 45 minutes!?!? Current research shows that the attention span of a six year old is roughly 15 minutes. These kids were ready for a nap even without being forced to sit quietly in front of a computer screen. What is going on?? We expect students to do much more at much younger ages. I walked in this morning half expecting a milk cart to arrive for snack, play tables, and a scheduled nap time. What do I know? I think it's crazy and our system is moving backwards. Forcing children to excel in things that they are not developmentally ready for is not the answer. In addition, parents are now expected to teach their children the things they used to learn in pre-school and kindergarten before they can even be admitted to pre-school. How is that for increasing the gap between the haves and the have-nots? Let's face it, there are many parents that either don't have the time, don't have the money, or don't have the ambition to teach their children much while their at home. These things transcend race and income level. There are plenty of families that are "well off" in which children are of low priority. Mom just wants her life back and little billy and suzy get carted around to day care and what not. I don't know anything...these are just some of my thoughts on the subject, and like I said...no one's asking me.

Pop quiz hot shot!

What do you do when strange pictures appear without explanation on your dining room wall? What do you do?

Write a story about them of course:

One day, Noone was picking flowers in a field. All of a sudden, something blocked out the sun…something big…something…scary. It was…DUN DUN DUN…a mustache. Noone screamed a long, horrible, bloodcurdling scream and started to run! Purple bowtie mustache man smiled a crazy spooky smile, bent down and grabbed a handful of flowers. Crazy spooky smile still full on, purple bowtie mustache man stomped after Noone with arms outstretched. Noone was terrified, so terrified that the sun frowned and the clouds began to cry. She ran as fast as she could, but she was no match for that scary mustache. Some say you can still hear Noone crying out, “NOOO purple bowtie mustache man!! NOOOOO!”

Happy Mother's Day to all you moms out there. I spent my day at the crew. It was awfully boring and all I wanted to do was enjoy a nice day at home and spend some time with my mom. I'm taking tomorrow morning off because this has been a busy week. That's it.

HI-LARI-OUS

...they just keep pulling me back in

I am once again just another cog in the mighty machine that is the retail world. The store mgr at the crew is leaving for another store in the mall this week. As a result, they would have been down to two managers and they didn't think 80 hour work weeks sounded very cool so they asked me to help them out for a while. I don't mind being a stand in...it definitely has perks. They were willing to work around my schedule and after the work drought that was student teaching, I can definitely use the money and the hours. Plus I get to work with super cool people every day I'm there. One major downside is that my desire to shop for "stuff" has returned quickly. We get such a great discount and when you constantly see the clothes, you start to imagine that you need them. Now I was perfectly content with what I had when I worked once a month...but the drooling has begun. Don't worry stemshul, I won't act on these feelings...it's just funny how the whole retail industry works. All day long I see people who probably can't afford to shop at our store (let's face it, who could without a discount?) running through in their heads what bill they can hold off paying so they can buy some new pants. Why? Because they're necessary...because they're new...because they have awesome detailing on the inside of the pockets that no one will ever see, but you have to have them because soon they'll be gone. And you will have missed your chance. Hey, I'm not making fun, it's my job to make people believe they need these pants. You need these pants...you need pants...need pants...PANTS!!

I'll be dreaming of chili dogs tonight...

What a great day. The weather was beautiful, albeit a bit chilly. I began my day as I begin most all of my Saturday mornings, freezing my (insert your own obscene word here) off at the ice arena. I again got to teach stroking where I earned myself a bonus $25. I skipped out on teaching hockey cause I had to get home, let the dogs out (who did? ME), and scoot on over to my cousin's bridal shower. Mmmm...delicious food, fun company, and entertaining shower games...you can't miss. It was here that I tasted the best "chex mix" ever. I headed home around 4pm to find my wonderful husband home already from his last day at his current job (he starts a new and improved one on Tuesday). We took the dogs on a lovely walk and then made a taco dinner and ate it outside at our awesome picnic table. We had to run a few errands, such as a successful search for the best "chex mix" ever (which turned out to be Munchies Ultimate Cheddar Mix), and on the way home made a stop at Cook's for some frozen treats, which I'm enjoying now. Mmmm...chocolate malt...I love that it takes at least 5 minutes longer to make my malt than Stemshul's soft serve vanilla cone. That's how you know it's done right.

Best friends are we...

I love you guys! Thanks for all the encouragement...yesterday went really well. I was so nervous, but the job was at the school I interned at so that made it better. I was a fifth grade teacher yesterday, and when I arrived in the room, I found no plans. I searched a little more, there was a schedule on the board...ok that helps...but wait, that was from the day before. Ooh ooh, there's a small notepad on his desk with scribbles on it. It had things like

9:15 - PE/math
9:45 - social studies?
11:30 - Susan Smith

written on it...not very convincing. So I went next door to one of the other fifth grade teachers to find out if she knew where I might find some plans, or a sub folder, or even some sort of special schedule. She was flabbergasted that the teacher didn't leave anything out...and to be honest, so was I. Turns out he typed them up for me and they just didn't print. He actually left very detailed plans for me that were extremely helpful...first crisis averted. My next crisis to endure, having all three fifth grade classes rotate through my room for science within 90 minutes. The two classes that were not mine were challenging because we had a lot to get through and only 30 minutes to do it in. I couldn't really lay down the law before we got started. The short amount of time turned out to be a blessing as well because thanded out the sudoku puzzles I brought in for them to do when they finished their stories. Some had done sudoku before and they were super excited. I brought 3 different puzzles for them, two 4x4 puzzles - one easy, one medium, and one 9x9 easy puzzle. They liked this. Then I only had about 3 minutes left at the end of the day to draw names for prizes. I should have allowed more time for this because they about up in arms when the bell rang and I had only drawn 4 names...at least they were 4 different names! So day one was a success and everyone on staff was helpful. I almost can't believe I'm going to get paid for the day after so long of having to pay to do the same thing.

Yeah!

Wish me luck! Tomorrow is my very first subbing job...with 5th graders. I'll let you know how it goes!

anger pants...on

I just want to state, for the record, how much I hate blogger right now. I can't post any damn pictures! Or is it just pictures from my own files?? Oh wait, before I post an internet picture I download it to my files. You know what they told me to do?? Use firefox!! Newsflash...I already use f-ing firefox! I'm gonna try to post a picture now and just to spite me I bet it will work. Damn blogger...for now!

what have I done??

Check it out.

Hey Ladies!

Because of recent events, I'm feeling slightly better looking than my significant other, as I'm sure you are too. So, in response to mustache month, I am proposing shaved head month! That oughta even out the playing field, eh? Or how about...hairy underarm + tank top month? Let me know your thoughts on these ideas, we must do something to ugly up for the next month. Ooh ooh, one more...how about all spandex, all the time + eating nothing but junk food month!! Just let me know when we should start this...pictures will follow soon.

Two dozen glazed

Breton Village D&W is my new favorite store. Have you ever tried their beef dip? It's delicious. And now that all (mostly) D&Ws have become Family Fares, I had given up hope of ever enjoying this tasty treat again. I like to spread it on tortilla shells to make little finger sandwiches. Stemshul likes to eat it with tortilla chips. Anyway, last time I had a craving for it I swung the closest D&W to us and found that they were closing early to make the change over. I searched for my beloved dip and did not find it. I went back after the change over and still did not find it. A couple weeks ago I had to make a quick stop to the nearest grocery store after school. This happened to be Breton Village where I happily discovered they had not become Family Fare AND they had my beef dip!!! Friday night hubby and I went grocery shopping and decided to stop out at the Village to pick up some more. We asked the young-ish cashier why they didn't become Family Fare and she said they did, they just didn't change the name. I think scared her when I asked "Are you still going to have the beef dip?" in a deep voice (according to Stemshul). Finally tonight, as the boys were watching Final Fantasy (yawn) I decided to pick up some Krispy Kremes. Being that it was 9:30 when I pulled up to the drive-thru and the sign said they closed at 9, I sadly drove away. To make a long story less long, yes, my new favorite store had Krispy Kremes, and even though they didn't taste as good as the real thing they certainly got the job done.

Oh yeah, it's mustache month...scary.