Frustrated Incorporated

Wow, the time gets away from me being back home. Not as much time to sit on my computer and blog...or much of anything else. This summer has flown by and now I feel like a bundle of mush, held together by fraying nerves. While it's great to be back, I underestimated how much I'd miss Arizona. I DO NOT miss the heat, but I do miss most other things. Most notably, my job. I felt so good about my career and the work I was doing every day. I was a part of a community, a family that watched out for me and cared about me and welcomed me from day one. Now I have nothing but doors slammed in my face. I have interviewed at five different schools, made it to the second round for 3, and nada. Meanwhile I'm desperately sending out cover letters and resumes all over Kent and Ottawa county, attending sub meetings, preparing for a long term sub job, and working at the crew (where, by the way, I feel most wanted and appreciated these days). Oh yeah, and then trying to carve out some time with my wonderful family. I can't believe Jack will be 11 months on Sunday...he's almost a year old! Where has the time gone? On top of all this, without a teaching job we will need to continue with our living situation as it is now. We are eternally grateful to be able to live here, but it's wearing on us all...and it's all my fault. Basically, as soon as I get a teaching job, we can begin to think about our future again. At least in Phoenix we were making progress on paying down our debt and in our careers. Why can't our choices in life be made simpler? Why does everything have to be a trade off? Yes, I'm with my family and friends, and Jack is with his grandparents...so why do I feel more unhappy now, than I have in a long time?