love is in the air

Puffed up plumage, brightly colored coverings, travelling in herds, and silly displays of raw athleticism are mating rituals reserved for the animal kingdom. You would quickly have seen this is not the case had you spent this morning attempting to teach in an ice arena overrun with young, quasi-good looking hockey players. The girls are all in tizzy and it is seriously annoying. Don't get me wrong...I remember those long summer days spent at the ice arena...school's out, your training regimen is strict, your coach is on vacation, and you've nothing better to do than strut your stuff for all the "hotties" who happening to be attending the aptly timed Hockey camp. Witnessing this all go down now however, seems like some strange psychological experiment designed to show that teenage "mating" rituals are really not all that different from animal mating rituals.

Let me set the scene: We're on the ice, all is quiet and going pretty well although senses are heightened because the females can detect the presence of a brood of new males. Suddenly, a small group a males appears at the window - apparently on break because of an ice make on NHL. The females eyes move immediately to the small group, and immediately away...musn't let them know they're aware of their presence. Soon the females are moving in herds, and vocalizing in loud and over-exagerated tones. Now, the females begin working extra-hard on whatever they happen to have been doing, and trying even harder to "ignore" the now growing group of males. The males eventually retire to their locker room after much encouragement from their coaches, and the population on OLY settles down. Now, however, the females are constantly watching the doors, bleachers, windows, and ramps and even a single male straggler, no matter how weak or unattractive, will set them off again.

These scenes are amusing to me because the girls are either unaware or completely indifferent that we totally get what's going on when they sit upstairs during their 10 minute zamboni break rather than in our locker room as usual. They quickly get off the ice, throw their skate gaurds on, leave all their layers off (look at my cute tank top!), and - in a line - trapse up the stairs. They casually sit at one of the empty tables where they pretend to ignore the boys and are simultaneously ultra-engaged and hopelessly disengaged in their own conversation so as to pick up any hint of boy interest. Hopefully, by next week the hockey brood will have moved on, and life at the rink will return to normal.